Horns, Hilarity, and Holiday Havoc - San Antonio’s Krampus Parade Opens a “Puro Pinche Portal”

San Antonio’s King William district was overrun with horns, bells, and festive chaos as the city hosted its first-ever Krampus Parade on December 5, 2024. This wasn’t your average jolly holiday event; it was a walk on the dark and hilarious side of Christmas, celebrating the horned, menacing Krampus, the legendary disciplinarian for kids who’ve landed on the naughty list.

The parade kicked off at the Blue Star Arts Complex, winding its way through Southtown streets as a mix of 150 participants including 15 krewes brought the lore of Krampus to life. Krewes were required to include at least one Krampus in their lineup, but many took it a step further, crafting costumes that ranged from lighthearted mischief to downright terrifying. Think Mardi Gras meets “run before Krampus gets you” vibes. 

At the King William gazebo, local dignitaries were humorously “pardoned” from Krampus's wrath in a bizarre yet charming ritual involving golden birch rods. Whether this absolved them of actual bad behavior remains questionable, but it certainly added a flair of theatrical hilarity to the event. “I think I just got forgiven for unpaid parking tickets,” quipped one attendee as the Krampus squad dramatically brandished their twigs. It’s unclear if the Krampuses were forgiving or simply running out of stamina from all the stomping and scaring.

The event didn’t go unchallenged. Some local religious groups raised concerns that the Krampus Parade might “open demonic portals” (because apparently, nothing says holiday cheer like a sprinkle of Satanic panic). Parade organizers, however, turned the controversy into a comedic triumph by debuting tongue-in-cheek merchandise that read “Puro Pinche Krampus Portal.” The cheeky response didn’t just diffuse tension; it redefined the festive spirit, proving that in San Antonio, even alleged supernatural gateways can inspire clever branding.

Grand Marshal Bob Crittenden summed it up best: “San Antonians have a knack for embracing the weird and wonderful. Whether it’s Día de los Muertos or zombies, why not add a horned holiday enforcer to the mix?” And so, Krampusnacht made its memorable mark on the Alamo City, blending eerie folklore with humor and artistry, and proving once again that sometimes, the naughty list is where all the fun happens.

Enjoy some of the images from the evening in the gallery set below.

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